What to consider if you’re considering Dry January
And some thoughts on how to make the best of it.
I have mixed feelings about Dry January.
On one hand, it makes complete sense why so many people feel drawn to it. Taking a break from drinking is beneficial. The mere fact that we feel like we need to take a break says a lot. Generally, we don’t “take breaks” from things that are truly good for us and sustainable. We don’t need a reset from things that nourish us. The urge to pause, to step away for a month, usually comes from a deeper knowing.
On the other hand, I feel that framing it as a break already sets us up to treat it as something temporary, something to get through before returning to business as usual. When we decide in advance that something has an end date, there’s often less openness about its possibilities. While that can still be useful, it can also keep us from really examining the habits we’re stepping away from and why we needed a break from them in the first place.
If approached with an open and curious mindset, Dry January can be more than a pause. It can become a stepping stone toward something more expansive and liberating.
Surviving through Dry January
Dry January can be challenging if it’s seen as something to survive and struggle through. Something you push through and endure. A temporary change with no real consideration behind it.
Surviving might look like canceling all your social plans so you never have to sit in the discomfort of not drinking. But avoiding places where you might come across alcohol isn’t a sustainable way to live (although depending on where you are in the process, it might be very necessary for some time), and it doesn’t reflect what intentional sobriety would actually be like. If you never put yourself in situations where alcohol is present, you don’t push your growth edges. You just avoid the discomfort.
Surviving might also look like white-knuckling your way through the month. Hating every minute. Counting down the days until it’s over. Already planning how you’ll drink the second February hits. So technically you’re not drinking, but mentally you’re already on the other side of it, never fully experiencing the benefits of sobriety or learning anything new about yourself.
If you go into Dry January believing you’re missing out, an alcohol-free life will feel like a struggle — deprivation, sacrifice, a cage instead of freedom. And it doesn’t have to be that way.
Thriving through Dry January
If given an honest effort, Dry January can be an opportunity to explore your relationship with alcohol more deeply. It can create space to ask questions like:
Why am I drinking? What does it add to my life, and what does it take away? When am I most likely to drink? What feels difficult about not drinking? Does it really give me everything I think it does? Does it liberate me or restrict me?
Your answers may change over time. Taking intentional time away from alcohol can create room for clarity, but only if you let yourself fully settle into the decision. During Dry January, all the reasons why you drink will be staring back at you: celebrations, fun, stress, minor inconveniences, frustration, happiness, boredom, avoidance.
In those moments, Dry January can become an experiment in practicing new responses to old triggers. An experiment in getting to know yourself more clearly and exploring a reality in which alcohol doesn’t take center stage.
Thriving through Dry January means fully embodying a choice. Letting yourself live from that choice long enough to learn from it.
How to make the best of it
First I want to acknowledge the biggest challenge: it’s about doing something uncomfortable and new that goes against your typical way of living. There’s a saying in the therapy world: “How people do one thing is how they do everything.” The point is this: How do you relate to discomfort? How do you guide yourself through something unfamiliar? Do you judge and beat yourself up? Or do you give yourself an out and rationalize never moving through the discomfort?
A gentler approach might involve offering yourself reassurance and guidance, making space for all the feelings that will show up in the process, or reaching out for support. As you move through challenging moments, pay attention to:
How your body feels, not just what your head says
Whether your mind feels louder or quieter
How you might start convincing yourself to quit
What shifts
What doesn’t
What feels easier than expected
What feels surprisingly hard
Maybe one month is not enough. Part of our brain always knows it’s temporary — that you can go back soon, which, of course, you always can. But that “this is just for now” mentality can keep you from fully living the experience. Sometimes extending it into a second and third month gives you something to compare. What it feels like to truly settle into it versus just passing through.
It doesn’t have to be a forever decision or a rule you must follow. Ultimately, Dry January isn’t about proving anything or following a rule. It’s about paying attention to what happens when you give yourself the space to choose differently and actually stay with that choice.
Cappuccinos are my creative currency! ☕️